My Dearest Middle Son,
Five years ago tonight, I crawled into bed, tired after a fun, busy weekend at a family reunion out in Rowley, having no idea that by noon the next day, I would have my second son! I have to say, I was pretty tickled when I woke up in labor at 5:00, on Labor Day! :) You were in a hurry to get here, barely letting us get to the hospital on time, and you have been keeping us on our toes ever since!
You are our little tiger. You are so full of life and energy. You run and bounce from one thing to the next. You love your brothers and you are a very affectionate and loving older brother. You are learning to be helpful and generous. This year, we have discovered that you love animals. Well, you don't want to get too up close and personal with them yet, but you love learning about them! We've made great use of our zoo passes this year! You love to tell us about animals and you want to be a zoo keeper when you grow up. You are also fascinated with Switzerland and plan to live there when you grow up! We're not sure how that is going to work with your plan to be the mayor of Calgary, but I'm sure by that time, technology will be advanced enough that it will be possible! :) And hey, you just might be the best mayor we've ever had! I love the special relationship we have, the way you love to cuddle with Mommy and have me sleep with you at night.
My sweet boy, I want to tell you how much I admire you. This past year has been full of challenges for you. You started preschool, and you didn't love it the way your big brother had and the way we all thought you would. But you went, and you stayed, and you toughed it out, even though it was more of a struggle for you than we realized. Right before Christmas, you were diagnosed with a disease that meant you had to change the way you ate and give up a whole bunch of your favorite foods, including Christmas cookies! But you handled it with such grace and acceptance. You handled the news better than your dad and I did! You accepted no longer being able to eat your favorite foods and you have quickly learned to ask, "Does this have gluten in it?" before accepting any food from other people. I am so proud of the way you have dealt with this! And then, this past spring, we found out that you had a condition that made it difficult for you to relate to other people socially. That was why you found preschool so hard, you didn't know how to interact with the other kids and it was scary for you. I wish so much we had known earlier and could have supported you more with that. But you learned your own ways to cope and you made it through the year. You are so strong and have such a "never give up" attitude. You are determined to do things yourself, even when it's difficult. And even when situations are incredibly stressful or difficult for you, you find a way to get through them. You have taught me so much in the past few months. It breaks my heart to think that some things are always going to be more difficult for you. But I know that you will overcome, because you are determined and you are a fighter. You are my hero!
We've had a lot of great things happen this past year too. We all loved camping at the lake this past season! You got braver in the pool and learned to ride a scooter, and you're eager to learn to ride a bike too! I bet by the end of next summer, you'll be riding like a pro! We had a great visit with Grandma and Grandpa. We've had fun trips together and a lot of adventures. And the upcoming year holds even more excitement for us. Like our trip to Disneyland next month!
My Z, I love you so much. More than I ever dreamed possible. Even when we're having our roughest days and I lose my patience, I love you. I will always love you and I will always be your biggest cheerleader. I pray that you will grow up to be strong, confident, and compassionate, and I know that you will achieve whatever you decide you want to achieve, because you won't give up until you do. You are strong, you are brave, and you are amazing!
Happy 5th Birthday, my sweet, amazing Boy. May this year be full of happiness, adventure, and love!
All my love, forever and always,
Mommy
Sunday, September 7, 2014
Monday, September 1, 2014
To my oldest on the eve of your first day of grade 1
My dear Boy,
Your backpack is packed, your lunch is waiting in the fridge, we've decided what we're having for breakfast tomorrow, and it's quiet upstairs, so I think you've finally fallen asleep. I think you were a bit excited about starting school tomorrow!
Tomorrow you start Grade 1. It's not your first year of formal schooling, but it is the start of a new chapter in our lives. For the past 6 1/2 years, you have spent the majority of your time at home with me and your brothers. We were the people you talked to, played with, confided in, and learned with. Starting tomorrow, you will be spending 7 hours of your day with other people. That will be the better part of the time that you are awake. Your teachers will join your dad and I in teaching and guiding you. For a large part of the day, they will be the ones teaching you to read, write, share, take turns and show respect. You will be spending more time interacting with your friends than with your brothers. They may expose you to some things you haven't encountered yet at home. They may know how to do things we haven't tried here, they may eat foods we don't eat here, they may speak in languages we don't speak or celebrate holidays we don't celebrate. I am excited that you get to have the input of so many more people in your life. Your teachers seem wonderful and I am so happy that between them and your friends, you will learn so many things that you might not have learned here at home with me. But I'm a little nervous too. Not everything that you learn over the next several years will be things I would have chosen for you to learn. You may learn what it's like to be bullied. You may be a witness to racism. You may learn about dangerous and unhealthy habits, about intolerance and hatred. Those are things I wish I could shield you from. But I cannot. I can only hope that in the past 6 1/2 years, I have laid a foundation that will help you to overcome the challenges you are going to face throughout your life.
I hope I have taught you how very loved you are. I love your spirit. You are enthusiastic and full of life and energy. You approach life head-on, ready to tackle anything it throws your way. You welcome and accept everyone, without any discrimination, and you are always happy to share whatever is exciting to you with whoever is nearby. You are kind, generous, and gentle. You get excited about the opportunity to help those in need. You are a busy and active boy, but you still take time to stop to snuggle, to sit on my lap for a story, and you still love to hold my hand while we are walking. You are curious and want to know every possibility! The words we hear most often from you are, "What if..." You are eager to learn and love to explore. I know that you are going to love all the new opportunities for learning and exploration that you are going to have in Grade 1!
I hope you never lose your spirit, your love for learning, your joy for life. I hope that you always see people the way you do now, as equals, as worthy of your time and attention, regardless of appearance or anything else. I hope you always find joy in giving and in helping those in need.
And now, I have to tell you a little secret. You might think that the most important thing is how you do in school. What grade level you're reading at by the end of the year. How many words you can spell. What your report card looks like. Here's the secret. It's not. I want you to always do your very best, but it doesn't matter to me whether you read 3 grade levels ahead of where you are or whether you're still learning to read basic words by the end of the year. What matters to me is who you are. I want you to be strong. Trust yourself. Don't be afraid to try new things, but trust your judgement. If you feel like something might be a bad idea, be brave enough to say no. Be kind. Always be kind. When you hear kids saying mean things about another kid, don't join in. When you see someone being picked on, stand up for them. When you see someone alone, be their friend. If someone never gets invited to any birthday parties, invite them to yours. I promise you we will make sure you can still invite your other friends. If you see someone struggling, help them, or help them find the help they need when you can't give it to them. Remember that we all have so much worth to God and treat everyone as the precious human being that they are. Remember that YOU matter! The way you think and feel, matters! When no one agrees with you or no one seems to care what is important to you, you matter. And even if it feels like everyone else is against you, remember that Mom and Dad are always on your side. We will always fight for you.
Most of all, remember that at the end of the day, you are coming home to a family who loves you to the sun and moon and back. Whether your day has been awesome and filled with excitement or the worst. day. ever! We are here to listen, to share your excitement when you learn something new or make a new friend, to hurt with you when you hurt, and to help you deal with bumps in the road. I hope you will always feel like you can talk to us about anything. And know that we love you and are proud of you, no matter what. We are proud of the boy you are and the person you are becoming, and there is nothing you can do to make us love you less.
Now, go out there and take on the world!!
All my love,
Mommy
Your backpack is packed, your lunch is waiting in the fridge, we've decided what we're having for breakfast tomorrow, and it's quiet upstairs, so I think you've finally fallen asleep. I think you were a bit excited about starting school tomorrow!
Tomorrow you start Grade 1. It's not your first year of formal schooling, but it is the start of a new chapter in our lives. For the past 6 1/2 years, you have spent the majority of your time at home with me and your brothers. We were the people you talked to, played with, confided in, and learned with. Starting tomorrow, you will be spending 7 hours of your day with other people. That will be the better part of the time that you are awake. Your teachers will join your dad and I in teaching and guiding you. For a large part of the day, they will be the ones teaching you to read, write, share, take turns and show respect. You will be spending more time interacting with your friends than with your brothers. They may expose you to some things you haven't encountered yet at home. They may know how to do things we haven't tried here, they may eat foods we don't eat here, they may speak in languages we don't speak or celebrate holidays we don't celebrate. I am excited that you get to have the input of so many more people in your life. Your teachers seem wonderful and I am so happy that between them and your friends, you will learn so many things that you might not have learned here at home with me. But I'm a little nervous too. Not everything that you learn over the next several years will be things I would have chosen for you to learn. You may learn what it's like to be bullied. You may be a witness to racism. You may learn about dangerous and unhealthy habits, about intolerance and hatred. Those are things I wish I could shield you from. But I cannot. I can only hope that in the past 6 1/2 years, I have laid a foundation that will help you to overcome the challenges you are going to face throughout your life.
I hope I have taught you how very loved you are. I love your spirit. You are enthusiastic and full of life and energy. You approach life head-on, ready to tackle anything it throws your way. You welcome and accept everyone, without any discrimination, and you are always happy to share whatever is exciting to you with whoever is nearby. You are kind, generous, and gentle. You get excited about the opportunity to help those in need. You are a busy and active boy, but you still take time to stop to snuggle, to sit on my lap for a story, and you still love to hold my hand while we are walking. You are curious and want to know every possibility! The words we hear most often from you are, "What if..." You are eager to learn and love to explore. I know that you are going to love all the new opportunities for learning and exploration that you are going to have in Grade 1!
I hope you never lose your spirit, your love for learning, your joy for life. I hope that you always see people the way you do now, as equals, as worthy of your time and attention, regardless of appearance or anything else. I hope you always find joy in giving and in helping those in need.
And now, I have to tell you a little secret. You might think that the most important thing is how you do in school. What grade level you're reading at by the end of the year. How many words you can spell. What your report card looks like. Here's the secret. It's not. I want you to always do your very best, but it doesn't matter to me whether you read 3 grade levels ahead of where you are or whether you're still learning to read basic words by the end of the year. What matters to me is who you are. I want you to be strong. Trust yourself. Don't be afraid to try new things, but trust your judgement. If you feel like something might be a bad idea, be brave enough to say no. Be kind. Always be kind. When you hear kids saying mean things about another kid, don't join in. When you see someone being picked on, stand up for them. When you see someone alone, be their friend. If someone never gets invited to any birthday parties, invite them to yours. I promise you we will make sure you can still invite your other friends. If you see someone struggling, help them, or help them find the help they need when you can't give it to them. Remember that we all have so much worth to God and treat everyone as the precious human being that they are. Remember that YOU matter! The way you think and feel, matters! When no one agrees with you or no one seems to care what is important to you, you matter. And even if it feels like everyone else is against you, remember that Mom and Dad are always on your side. We will always fight for you.
Most of all, remember that at the end of the day, you are coming home to a family who loves you to the sun and moon and back. Whether your day has been awesome and filled with excitement or the worst. day. ever! We are here to listen, to share your excitement when you learn something new or make a new friend, to hurt with you when you hurt, and to help you deal with bumps in the road. I hope you will always feel like you can talk to us about anything. And know that we love you and are proud of you, no matter what. We are proud of the boy you are and the person you are becoming, and there is nothing you can do to make us love you less.
Now, go out there and take on the world!!
All my love,
Mommy
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